radical dreamers;

candhl @ 2009-12-19T13:46:00

2009-12-19T05:46:02Z

Its cold and I'm walking aimlessly around ion at the expense of time that I do not need, ironically. But who in this world wants to give up time when there is a possibility that life ends in 2012? Do not misunderstand that I'm as free as a bird of any sort. Trust me, I have a lot to do. But from the perspective of a procrastinator, I currently am severely unoccupied in this world that's full of hassle.

It's time for me to walk over to Somerset but I chose to sit in a cubicle blogging. It's raining quite heavily now. Should I or shouldn't I walk in the rain? It's a choice between being professional and being dry and unsoggy. I feel myself inching closer and closer to being sick again. Sinus infection seems to have an inkling towards me. I think its the room, it must be! The room is in a severely warring state. Ammunition all hidden under the piles and piles of clothing, guns and blades under the bed. I can say its my style, you can say that I have none. I forbided the roomie to step in before I clear it up, soon.

It's time for me to leave now.
And I just missed the fucking train.

candhl @ 2009-12-15T23:09:00

2009-12-15T15:09:59Z

How many of them came true for you?
I'm just waiting for that one and I still have 15 more days to achieve it.

Meanwhile, new wishes were made!

candhl @ 2009-12-11T18:16:00

2009-12-11T10:16:19Z

I got fired. HAHAHAHAHA

Worked in a mecha place Biopolis.
Brought me nearer to Tokyo-III.
Goodbye to labrats, zebra fishes and tormented flies,
Pretty macs and dusty dells.

Goodbye to the weirdest and slackest job in the world.

I can almost hear Yamashita.

http://www.livejournal.com/update.bml

2009-12-10T11:11:44Z

Music, darkness and alcohol makes you do things you would never think you could or would. Whether good or bad, sane or not. It sorts of reminds me of dreams except that perhaps you have more control(or maybe not), scenes rushing past like a movie scene unsure if its real or not.

You shoot up to the sky like some kind of fireworks and suddenly fade out and die.

I'm collecting my camera soon,eggcited. Hell eggcited.

Roomie, don't feel bad about that night! And tell me i'm the one that saved you pleaseeeeee?:D

candhl @ 2009-11-29T15:24:00

2009-11-29T07:24:46Z

I almost feel like getting myself a MOOKs tee.
It'll act as a nice pillowcase and I can pretend and hug it all I want!

candhl @ 2009-11-24T14:41:00

2009-11-24T06:41:05Z

candhl @ 2009-11-18T16:37:00

2009-11-18T08:37:33Z

I have this sudden urge to blog my ass off about societal issues but I have a major hurdle of reading the papers first.

candhl @ 2009-11-14T03:38:00

2009-11-13T19:38:55Z

Someone I know from a long time ago got knocked up.
Shocked but not surprised.

What surprised me was her decision to get ~~knocked down~~ married.
I know it is not my place to comment on the biggest decision of her life but I can't help but question why.
I seriously don't know what to think, getting married at 20

But, what's done is done and I wish you all the best.

***

A couple of days back, I almost lost my phone.
It was a bad day, maybe not literally but symbolically in many ways.

I broke my mug in hall. (Now I have to find a replacement, Boo)
I was severely under prepared for French Oral (I'm underprepared however whatever wherever for French btw)
We ran in the rain to class
I almost lost my phone.

And so, apparently I left my phone on the floor along the corridors of the many tutorial rooms which one of them held my oral test. Just so happen, one of my tutorial mate was there, using her MBP designing a penguin.

What can I say.

She's this foreign student, probably Phillipino or Thai (I think its the first) who looks like a nerd. Bespectacled, weird dress sense and a cruel enthusiasm in class. She's always with her fellow foreign friend too.

This little woman caught my attention on the first francais lecon I went for. She was loud, talking fervently with her partner in a language I do not understand. It was mixed with a little French here and there.

I made faces at my roomie who happens to take the same tutorial whenever the two behind was being untolerable. Being who I am, I coated them with about half of the profanities I know. I laughed, chided and reacted at every weird comment they had. I was a totaly Bitch.

And now that the little lady and her beau saved my life together with my phone's, I am learning to refrain from making fun of others.
This is a conscience-lesson learnt.

Nonetheless, Thank you very much.

candhl @ 2009-11-08T17:08:00

2009-11-08T09:25:53Z

Meow meow meow
I'll be awesome now
See me study, see my claw,
I'll be great and top them all!

thanks mark :D

*****

A priming of expectations clearly demonstrated,
is no return now that it's stated.

candhl @ 2009-11-07T23:42:00

2009-11-07T15:45:05Z

One good way of indoctrination is to paste intended message on the toilet wall.
You see it everyday, obviously more than once, sometimes longer than the others.

And how is it proven to be useful?

I resisted using the word 'But' during a conflict as advised not to by an anger management article pasted in the toilet wall at home.

candhl @ 2009-11-06T18:51:00

2009-11-06T11:14:13Z

Apparently I keep assuming I did better. Apparently apparent I didn't.
I hate this feeling.
What the shit.
Pui.

Never thought such things can affect me that badly. Strike the competitiveness in me.
No, maybe its just pure envy.
I don't do shit to improve.
Now that is a bad statement cos' it reeks self-fulfilling prophecy.

candhl @ 2009-11-05T21:48:00

2009-11-05T13:58:25Z

A long entry admist short ones. Interesting.

Drinking is decadent. Falling down is decadent as well.

Drinking brings out the child in your. Falling down does that too.

Drinking makes you miss lessons. Falling down makes you miss them as well.

Drinking is drinking, falling down is another thing.

But whatever you say, do or think, we are decadent creatures.

I wish you both a Happy 21st Birthday (F)

Reflections

2009-10-28T22:16:12Z

November is coming, yet again.
This time last year I think I was fretting for the oncoming hell of A levels. And to think, one year is soon going to be over(and I am so going to hit 20, apologies to those whose birthdays are in January). So I'm here to do my little bouts of reflection and recollection of the..past.

A levels.

I got it easier than most people did. People CRY out of the pure stress that their doomsday is approaching. They drop their teeth and hair, grow frail and scrawny and start to mold. I didnt. I was calm(more than what I had expected) and rather nonchalant. And kids, that is not the way to go but neither is killing yourself over some weirdout examination.
Why was I so collected?

Basically, it's just in a complacent procrastinator's blood.

I didn't think I was the king of the world(c'mon I was from one of the rear JCs) and I knew I had a screw or two loose up there where the memory section is involved. Trust me, memory is a BIG deal when it boils down to 3 H2 Arts subjects.
But heck, I just didn't get myself all flustered up with datelines and assignments.

Slacker.
And I think I sound like a certain kind of papaya, talking about the As like this.

My thoughts on the exams? Seriously weirdout.
Cambridge likes to hit people on their eyebrows, someplace you'd least expect. No, I don't really mean that they like to give you surprises in the form of fresh questions and topics that haven't been tested for the previous years. I mean they like to SURPRISE you with questions and topics that just came out the year before. YES. But PLEASE DO NOT ONLY COVER THE PAST YEAR TOPICS. Cover EVERYTHING.

And so, I began sitting for papers and papers, from 3rd November all the way to the 24th. No Kidding. The last paper which was about 2 weeks after the second last(wtf I know) didn't even feel like an exam. As usual, people discuss everything after each paper, which is something you would want to hear and sometimes/most of the time not want to hear. Why should you find out that your answers differ from someone else's, and not preferrably someone that supercedes you in class?

That would make your teeth drop out more.

Seriously, grades are whacked.
Didn't know how I managed to get some grades both good and bad. The only two I got what I predicted was my Math and Literature. Bogus.
Reminds me totally of O levels which happens to be marked by Cambridge as well.

But the main focal point of today's entry: Do not believe your teachers when they tell you A level is the last hurdle you have to overcome.

BULL.
CRAP.
MAXIMUS.

Why?

I'm studying like a rabid dog for my first semestral examinations. And trust me. It's one A levels per semester.

Rant Completed.

candhl @ 2009-10-28T01:04:00

2009-10-27T17:16:53Z

I want to feel special. Specially special.
I want to feel I'm appreciated. Given back what I deserve.
I want to feel what you have felt so many times.

I'm selfish. I do not expect nothing after giving. Or maybe that isn't being selfish.
That I'd say is being reasonable.
Just let me cure myself.

candhl @ 2009-10-26T21:06:00

2009-10-26T13:23:21Z

Being Busy.
I think I am busy. But there are people around me faring much worst than me. Am I still Busy? Or is there another more serious word for it?

Infatigable? Maybe Dexterous? Any word synonymous to a Superman.
(A person who can squeeze atrociously atrocious amounts of work to complete, events to attend and people to socialise with all into the un-expandable 24 hours a day 7 days a week schedule.)

But that is not what I am.
I am just busy.

***
I am a communication student as of this August. But I still can't talk to big groups of people. I can't get my ideas across and I don't sound coherent and right. I feel embarrassed basically because I'm supposed to be able to do it. So let me learn it my way, or just shove it down my system. Whatever way works.

I can't even imagine Thursday coming again. Frightnight.

***
I miss my mummy, my new mattress and purple walls. I miss my life of non-existence and zero commitments. I miss being a slob.

candhl @ 2009-10-25T17:36:00

2009-10-25T09:37:53Z

It will always be a betrayal to me.

candhl @ 2009-10-24T20:07:00

2009-10-24T12:47:04Z

Where is out?
I really don't know.

candhl @ 2009-10-18T18:05:00

2009-10-18T10:09:26Z

Communication in Personal Relationships.

It's a thoroughly technical view about relationships be it friendship, spouse, partners or family. I see it broken down to its basics and while reading it I refer the points to my personal life.

Hmm.

It's shockingly true, these researchers are good.

candhl @ 2009-10-17T18:51:00

2009-10-17T11:26:02Z

I can't even start to explain how much love I get from that room. And I know the newest edition to the family (Milk) feels it too! I've met kind, fun, loving, giving people in hall and I half want to attribute that to good karma from my past life. Right Milk?

*Milk's a little naughty, speedy, pouncing kitten that needed to borrow some company for awhile. It's been in our care for about 3 days(i think...HMMM) and looks like we're enjoying him a little too much. Hah!

I've never seen anything get so worked up by things that move.

I kinda dozed off a little while typing this. (Y)

It's quite a weird scene when guys of a certain age cuddle and coo over a little kitten. The image, I would say is not exactly wrong but nothing's right about it either. No matter what, the love I see overpowers much more.

Irresistable isnt it?
Oh ya, Milk is black.

candhl @ 2009-10-11T19:50:00

2009-10-11T19:16:43Z

Yes, the word is BOOMz.
Canon Photomarathon 2009.

candhl @ 2009-10-07T09:56:00

2009-10-07T02:06:49Z

alan says: hey!
alan says: are you feeling better alr
Fizzy Fizzy says: Hello!
Fizzy Fizzy says: a tiny bit ahhaa
Fizzy Fizzy says: still havent seen my doc yet
Fizzy Fizzy says: :)
alan says: you were supposed to yesterday!
Fizzy Fizzy says: procrastination is king
Fizzy Fizzy says: sadly
alan says: where are you sitting today anyway
Fizzy Fizzy says: on my bed
Fizzy Fizzy says: HAHA

I must have coughed like a mad dog yesterday during lecture. BOO
People tell me it's the water in NTU. I can't think of anything to disagree with. Maybe plus the air in my room. And oh ya, not forgetting the lack of sleep. WEE

candhl @ 2009-10-05T09:36:00

2009-10-05T01:36:41Z

I saw this little girl throwing a little tantrum at the nearby coffee shop at my place the other evening. Small as she may seem and look, this little girl donned in pink packed a punch. Her expressions and actions made it priceless for a spoilt princess. With folded arms and a face that kills, she held her ground throughout their family dinner, refusing to eat and refusing to admit defeat. Rude and inconsiderate as I may be, looking at her table while they are eating, i pretty much enjoyed looking at her

Then came her brother who was beside her. Older by I would say ten years? He was constantly trying to pacify her, make her feel better and tried to feed her. She gave him that 'go away' face that made me laugh. That was cute, and funny. It made me think. I want a big brother like that too. Who cares and really wants to make me smile. :D

candhl @ 2009-09-24T11:04:00

2009-09-24T03:11:59Z

Welcome to Carnation General Hospital, where the depressed come out happy, the paranoid emerge confident, and the schizophrenic become whole. Then enter Annie, who refuses to buy into this myth. Suspicious of her charismatic doctor, she throws the normally serene mental institution into a state of disarray, forcing current patients Bill and Jill to reevaluate their own situations as well. Join these characters as they wade through the viscous mess of past and present, and struggle to rise above the concrete skies that hold them in.

Look at that. Looks cool eh? Heh.
This is the production to watch people so get tickets from me. Watch with friends, family, your SO or even strangers.

candhl @ 2009-09-21T02:43:00

2009-09-20T20:09:38Z

What's a life without resolution?
A pistol without bullets.
What's a resolution without determination?
A pistol with bullets and no trigger.

candhl @ 2009-09-16T15:07:00

2009-09-16T07:37:36Z

Confidence is good, overconfidence is a shot to your foot.

and now,

I am going back to my roots :)